A Telecaster.
Be a vocalist and a lead guitarist.
I can't find the right words to describe what I feel right now. Confusion, loss of hope, doubts arising, fear, uncertainty, sorrow. I don't really know. Sometimes, I want to turn my back on the world. But I know it won't do me any good.
Have you ever loved and lost somebody that came back to you again? I've been moving on, then he came again. Maybe I should blame myself for being a coward. For not being able to say I don't want him to enter my life again. We are more than friends but still less than a couple. I can't find the strength to say it to him every time i look at his eyes, every time he tells me he loves me. There is doubt.
A strong doubt that always bothers me. I doubt his love for me. Trust is hard to regain once lost. Trust is important in any relationship. I confess that I dwell in the past. I fear that he will look for someone new again when he isn't satisfied with me anymore. I know he isn't a really good man. He's still young, so am I. He's more immature than me. I am really sure that I love him.
Maybe I am just in love with the idea that I still love him. I am just so scared to lose him though I don't want to be with him anymore. And I hate myself for it!
Labels: emo
